Saturday, October 15, 2005

Hit The Pub, It's Happy Hour!!!

WOOHOO!!!! Got a free weekend ahead of me for a change of pace. I got some plans for my wife. SHHH!!! Keep it a secret, okay? At the end of every work week, whether it is on a Friday, or a Saturday, I get all excited with myself (as the majority of Americans do, I believe), and I sing a little diddy (thanks for the word, Dawn!) on the way home. I am by myself of course, so I don’t have to feel so self-conscious about anything, and I just belt it out. I mean sing (YELL) as loud and obnoxious as I can, enough to hurt my own ears, and come close to cracking my Yukon’s windows. It’s a Bob & Tom ( my FAVORITE radio morning show!), song, and here we go………………..



THE DRINKING SONG

My work day’s done
Go grab a shower
Let’s hit the pub
It’s happy hour
If we get bombed
Who gives a damn
I’m not as drunk
As you think I am!


Those chicks right there
Don’t look to good
But three more beers
I guess I would
It’s either them
Or my right hand
I’m not as think
As you drunk I am


So buy another round
We’ll sit right here and drink ‘em down
Get everyone another beer
You’ll have to kick us outa here


Say are you girls
Waitin’ on your friends
What did you say
Your lesbians
Bartender cancel those two drinks
I’m not as am
As you drunk I think


This beer is movin’ like a train
I think my lizard needs a drain
But first I’ll have a double shot
I’m drunk you think
As you am is not


So buy another round
We’ll sit right here and drink ‘em down
Get everyone another beer
You’ll have to kick us outa here


This bathroom’s nice
As it can be
It’s got four walls
I’ve puked on three
Oops here comes more
I’ll use the sink
I’m not as thrunk
As you am I dink


I put that bouncer
Right in his place
I smacked his elbow
With my face
He’s lucky that
It’s closing time
Drunk am is not
As you think you I’m


So buy another round
We’ll sit right here and drink ‘em down
Get everyone another beer
You’ll have to kick us outa here!





And there you have it! I am such a dork!! And believe you me, I can sing and dance just like a white boy! NO rhythm, NO talent, NO anything whatsoever!!!! I don’t drink or anything anymore, I just really like the song, as stupid as it is, and it makes me laugh. My work buddies sometimes go bar-hopping after work, if we get out early enough (before 3 a.m.), and they invite me, but I don’t do that anymore. So it reminds me of them and their stories.


Well, enough of that. On to other things. I am planning on helping my wife (Angi) on some things around the house- sweep, pick up stuff, clean up the computer area, mow the yard, and other stuff. Tommorrow, I plan on suprising her with some candles, have a love music cd I made for her playing on the stereo, and not forgeting to put on some of her favorite type of cologne, and THEN seducing the crapola out of her. I have done NOTHING even remotley romantic in a LONG time, so I plan on romancing her, and hopefully, if I am lucky, I will get lucky! LORD I hope so! If not, well I tried at least, and that counts for something, right?


I am flying high right now! (not THAT kind of high!) EVERYTHING is going great! Well, not everything, I mean, as a professional pessimist, I can find bad things, or not so great things in everything also. I can see the glass as half empty, or half full, but does it even matter when the glass happens to be full of PISS?! (anyway, back to flying)… Work has been going good, same long hours, dark clouds from the Delphi bankruptcy clusterfuck, but besides that, it has been a GOOD week! My daughter and son love me, me and Angi have been doing wwwwwwwwaaaaaayyyyyy better than usual, (no fighting, just happy times!), and everything is just hokey-pokey!!! My dad was nice enough to send me a trigger lock for our home protection (20 gauge shotgun), so that was VERY nice of him! That way, the kiddos are safe from doing anything stupid, although, we don’t have to worry about that anyway for MANY MANY years!!! My mom who still works at Delphi (I got her hired on there in 1999), is trying to get the EEEFFFF outta there!! When Delphi was spun off from GM in 1999, they had a separation agreement, so Delphi workers can still transfer to GM, and vice versa.


On a separate note, THANK YOU to mom (JUST A MOM) for being there and lifting my spirits up! Love ya mom!


On a secondary separate note, I am just letting everyone know for the hell of it, that I spell like SHIT. I mean, freakin’ awful. Let’s just say that Microsoft’s Word program (with the lovely spellchecker), has me spoiled! Blogger has a
Add-in for the word program where you can save a draft on word, and it will transfer it to your blog for you. So I just type my post or whatever onto word, spellcheck the shit out of it, and hit the save as draft icon, and it saves it onto blogger. I then open up blogger and edit the draft from there, and then (wallaaa) post it! Piece of cake! It works for me, so ppppppppphhhhhhhhttttttttttttt to you!!

(you meaning whoever is reading this post of course!!)


HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND! I SURE AM HOPING,
(FINGERS CROSSED HERE),
THAT MINE IS LUCKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!


7 Comments:

Blogger JUST A MOM said...

Matt,,Matt,,Matt,, You do have a gust of romance in there! I love it!! and where are the babies gunna be? I have to say my hart does chipper up when I read you write like this. Hey I started on baby boy's quilt yesterday,Baby girls will be started today. They shoudl be done by Christmas. OK you need to "SLAINE" me real slow how you do that post stuff again. GOOD LUCK!!

Sat Oct 15, 12:48:00 PM EST  
Anonymous Jerry said...

Don't ya just love Bob & Tom? It was a Mr. Obvious Weekend. Sweet.

Sat Oct 15, 09:45:00 PM EST  
Blogger JUST A MOM said...

Well Matt how did your week end go? Did ya pull it off? Did ya do some dishes? Did ya change a diaper? Did ya get some ice cream? did ya sit and relax with the wifey difey and babies? Did ya get some time to jsut sit and reflect on life? Well it is Monday, what did ya do?

Mon Oct 17, 02:22:00 PM EST  
Blogger JUST A MOM said...

Hey how did you write that stuff by your comments like the prozac thing?

Mon Oct 17, 03:57:00 PM EST  
Blogger Bethany said...

I saw your from Ft. Wayne?? Thats cool, I used to live there... Do you know the addition Briar Gate? That used to be my old neighborhood! Crazy.

Tue Oct 18, 02:17:00 AM EST  
Blogger Walking Contradiction said...

Mom, I will email you.

Tue Oct 18, 05:39:00 AM EST  
Blogger Walking Contradiction said...

We live in Aboite township most of which is being annexed into Ft. Wayne this year, sometime. Where is your old addition at? I think I have heard of it, but I'm not sure. We love Ft. Wayne! There is SO much to do!

Tue Oct 18, 05:41:00 AM EST  

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